#stuffthathelps

Hii!

So, I've been wanting to do something along these lines for a little while and couldn't figure out the best way to execute it. I've had quite a few people over the past couple of years contacting me on social media with almost a cry for help for various reasons; depression, anxiety, eating disorders, bipolar disorder to name a few. I think this is mostly because of what I try to do in terms of mental health with my posts and with the happy newspaper having a positive effect on people's mental health. As much as I try and (so so badly) want to help all of those who contact me, I can't physically do this... It's a full-time job and people go through years of education and research to get to those jobs. However, saying this, I'm human and I want to help in any way I can. In the past I have created a list of people/places/charities who I know do wonders helping with various issues and problems but these are often very general umbrellas over these often very specific issues. I had the idea to set up a forum or a facebook group where people could join and chat with those going through similar things in their lives but stepped back from that because I was told that having a whole mix of people with different disorders for example, may not necessarily always be a positive thing as it could trigger others and not be very helpful... so I scrapped that... but have been thinking about it ever since.

I spoke on a panel in London two days ago about self-care and mental health and it was very eye-opening and wonderful in equal measure. A couple of the questions from the audience were about this very topic and how they've been on waiting lists with their GP or mental health services in their area but A) they're not getting anywhere because the system don't know how to cope with more than one type of disorder for example or B) they're still waiting and/or being sent back and fourth to different people/services which is causing them even more stress/anxiety etc.

If you can get help this way then fantastic, please do! Always talk to someone about what you're going through whether that's a friend, a professional or family member you can trust. The idea I've had is for those feeling a bit lost, in need of help or those who have found a 'safe place' or something that has really helped and could be shared with others who may need that safe place too.

... The hashtag #stuffthathelps is born.

Now, this may not work... But I thought it was at least worth a shot.

I've never 'created a hashtag' before but I know that you can now follow hashtags in the same way you can follow accounts on instagram which I think is a great idea. This is one of the only ones I could find that worked and hadn't already been used thousands of times, so we're almost starting a brand new space for this.

#stuffthathelps can literally be anything and that's the beauty of it, I want it to be a way of people connecting with others going through similar things and maybe even realising something or finding help/comfort/relief in something they haven't really understood recently or their whole life.

A good example of this, which has made me take the step to creating this 'safe place' for people to post their #stuffthathelps is a book I'm reading at the minute, 'The Highly Sensitive Person'... I posted a loooong story on my instagram about this book because it's something that has helped me most of my life growing up. My Mum originally found an article in You magazine that had a checklist to see if you're 'highly sensitive' and most of it, if not all, rung true for me as a child. My Mum bought 'The Highly Sensitive Child' book and as I say it made things so much clearer, why I was slightly different to a lot of my friends, why I startled easily, had trouble sleeping, was effected by loud noises and bright lights, why I cried every time I was dropped off at nursery etc etc. My Mum bought 'The Highly Sensitive Person' book for me years ago and I've tried to start reading it several times but I just haven't stuck to it but recently I have... Maybe because the world has been overwhelming me and I'm finding comfort in the fact that it's totally normal, I don't know but I just know it's helping. I hadn't really considered not knowing about 'highly sensitive people' most of my life because thanks to my Mum I have. However, after posting about it on my story, a handful of people have messaged, some in tears at how spot on it is for them and how it's made a lot of things make a lot more sense... People who have gone their whole life up to this point thinking they were a little bit odd and 'overly sensitive or shy' like we're often told.

So that's just one thing that has and does help me, not just the book but knowing I'm not alone. 'Reasons To Stay Alive' by Matt Haig is another book that has helped me and thousands of others, heaps and heaps! Sunglasses also help me, they really are like a safe place... It means people can't necessarily give me eye contact (I seem to give EVERYONE eye contact when I don't have them on... probably because I'm highly sensitive and empathetic so want to make sure everybody is okay... and therefore this means they want to be pals or tell me about their whole life, which is mostly fine but not if I'm having an overwhelming day) - they also give the world a slightly warmer, darker and calmer filter which is definitely something I need often. And, of course, creating The Happy Newspaper was my therapy through a not so great time and has had the exact same effect on far more people than I could ever imagined.

So, enough rambling... Let's see if we can help a few more handfuls of people. After talking at the event and listening to answers from the other panelists, it turns out there's A LOT of resources out there to help you and me but if we don't talk about them to others, nobody will ever know about them. It's important we share these little golden nuggets and even if it doesn't help us personally it might be something that can help somebody we know now or in the future.

A few examples of #stuffthathelps:

• A book that helped you through a tough time
• An Instagram account that makes you laugh on a daily basis
• An email newsletter that brings you positivity
• A subscription that you've bought somebody as a gift
• A Facebook page that gives you comfort surrounding a disability or disorder
• A Twitter page that empowers you
• Something that helped you through a sudden death in your family
• A blogger/vlogger who has made you see sense
• A blog/forum that has helped you with your new business
• An activity/event that has been like therapy to you
• A routine that helps you be calm
• An exercise or class that gives you some time away from you busy life/brain
• A type of tea that helps with tummy problems
• A breathing exercise you do
• Something that helped you as a new parent
• A list technique you do to help you not be overwhelmed or stressed
• A book or magazine that has helped you understand something better
• A great meme account

YOU GET THE DRIFT?

The thing to realise is that your #stuffthathelps is going to help everyone, it might only help one other person but that person might really really need it. All acts of self-care are different for different people, and that's totally okay! You need to find what works for you.

I'm eventually going to create a page on The Happy News website for 'if you're not feeling so happy' where I will combine a lot of these things.

Okay, let's do this.... 

Keep smiling,

Emily x